Thirteen Things

Today is lucky number 13! To celebrate, I am going to list 13 things I’ve discovered in the last 13 days.

  1. I’m enjoying my own (sober) company a lot more than I thought I would.
  2. I was drinking to numb a lot of painful feelings.
  3. I am now being forced to deal with all those painful feelings, which is really hard because it’s about 15 years worth of alcohol suppression.
  4. I’m more inclined to clean, run errands and be out and about after work now that it doesn’t involve alcohol. Previously, I’d have the gumption, but after a few drinks I’d lose the will to be productive.
  5. I look forward to waking up without a hangover.
  6. I still enjoy the bar atmosphere and haven’t felt tempted while at bars with my husband or friends, but I’m wondering if that will change.
  7. I’m excited for events that are months away because I know I will be sober and will enjoy myself more.
  8. I’m still struggling with my eating habits, but things are evening out.
  9. If my glass is empty, I will fill it up and drink until the pitcher is gone. I discovered this after purchasing a water pitcher over the weekend. It sits on the coffee table while we watch TV, and I have a compulsion to drink it until it’s gone. It was a mind-blowing epiphany.
  10. There is such a thing as a sugar hangover.
  11. When I see people drink on TV, I miss it. When I see people drink in real life, I don’t miss it.
  12. I don’t think I have ever been as hydrated as I am right now.
  13. As scary as it sounds to say it out loud, I don’t ever want to drink again.

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