Everyday Lessons

I started Day 6 with a run! It was much easier to wake up at 4:45 a.m. after having had only water the night before vs. a bottle of wine. Go figure! Again, maybe it’s a weird placebo mental state, but I feel like running is becoming so much easier! Maybe I am just more hydrated? Whatever the reason, I am thrilled. I have several races on the horizon and can’t wait to see what happens with sober training.

When I told my husband I was embarking on this challenge he said an interesting thing.

“I think it’s a great idea! I’m so excited for you. I have been noticing some signs of addiction, but I hadn’t said anything. I don’t know – I wasn’t ready to go there. I am proud of you and think this is a wonderful thing!”

Whoa! We have been together for 8 years. I’m not sure why I assumed my habits had gone unnoticed, but clearly I had. We all know what assuming does…

The whole conversation made me feel sad. His whole life has been surrounded by addiction. He’s never struggled with it, but it was a part of his life from an early age and for many years. The mere thought that I could potentially be another facet of that makes me cringe.

I made this decision for me, but he is a part of me. We are a family and being sober is hugely beneficial to both of us. I need to remember that when the going gets tough, I have so much more to lose than sobriety.

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